Christmas shirt. How can I tell my parents it doesnt fit?

I asked for a band shirt in mens in a xxl (I am a woman and generally take an XL, but can’t on things I don’t try on because my chest is rather large and I don’t know if it’ll fit) my mother went ahead and bought a womens XL with my name on the back. It wont go over my chest.
If I tell her, she’ll start screaming at me, telling me I’m fat and ungrateful for what she bought, but its not my fatty bits thats the problem, its my boobs.

If you are still under-age, gently remind her that until you are an adult, she has a legal obligation to feed and clothe you — and that means providing you with clothes that fit, no matter what your size or shape is. At the very least, she should know exactly what your size is, and spend her clothing money for you accordingly.

If you are an adult, she still has no business criticizing you in such a belittling way, but you should be old enough to handle her verbal abuse with some dignity. Try telling her gently but bluntly that the shirt doesn’t fit. Repeat this as often as needed, as patiently as you can.

Only if you need to, ask her (gently!) what size you requested when you two first discussed this as a gift from her for you. If she gets abusive, try “answering” any criticism without words: hear her out all the way, maintaining eye-contact all through whatever she has to say, and let her rant until she has nothing left to say. But no matter what amount of work and strain it costs you, don’t say anything, let her exhaust herself.

You then have a fresh, immediate example of her feelings for you to hold up to her. Maybe ask her point-blank, “What’s more important to you, Mom? Having my love and respect for you, or having me be able to fit any shirt you choose for me, even the ones you know are too small?” Make the point simply that you cannot wear a shirt that is too small, no matter what the reason is why you now have such a shirt.

As a last resort, try the shirt on in her presence. If you and she can’t return it anyway, the demonstration of the exact nature of the size problem should be graphic enough to convince her.

Btw, women who gain weight gain it especially noticeably in the breasts, usually. If you are in fact overweight, her criticism stands, however little right she has to voice her criticism of *anyone* for their weight, especially in rude or obnoxious ways.

Also btw, is she overweight, or has she ever been? Has she ever had any weight issues at all? Is she closely related to anyone with problems being overweight, either now or in her life past? If she really would “scream” at you for not fitting into the shirt-size she foolishly chose, she may have some underlying unhealthy attitudes that she needs to examine (and, we hope, get rid of).

Good luck!

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BAND LEGALO KRIMINALO live show rehearsal #1 SUMMER NIGHT

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